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Oh sure that looks innocent enough – just a bunch of Peanuts characters hanging out at the pumpkin patch on Halloween, but did you know that they’ve all been exposed to time-released evil spirits delivered to them via witch-cursed Halloween candies?  Did you know that their souls have been commandeered by Satan’s minions?  It’s TRUE!  Lucy, Linus, Peppermint Patty, Pigpen, and Linus are all working for the devil!

You want to know how I know?  I read a column titled “The Danger of Celebrating Halloween” By Kimberly Daniels on the Christian Broadcasting Network website:

The word “holiday” means “holy day.” But there is nothing holy about Halloween. The root word of Halloween is “hallow,” which means “holy, consecrated and set apart for service.” If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer’s!

…

During Halloween, time-released curses are always loosed.  A time-released curse is a period that has been set aside to release demonic activity and to ensnare souls in great measure.

…most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.

I do not buy candy during the Halloween season.  Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store.  The demons cannot tell the difference.

…

Halloween is much more than a holiday filled with fun and tricks or treats.  It is a time for the gathering of evil that masquerades behind the fictitious characters of Dracula, werewolves, mummies and witches on brooms.  The truth is that these demons that have been presented as scary cartoons actually exist.  I have prayed for witches who are addicted to drinking blood and howling at the moon.

…

There is no doubt in my heart that God is not calling us to replace fall festivals and Halloween activities; rather, He wants us to utterly destroy the deeds of this season.  If you or your family members have opened the door to any curses that are released during the demonic fall festivals, renounce them and repent.  I have. Then declare with me:  ”As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!”

I found the column via an email link sent to me by AU, but that link is dead.  I searched for it using the search engine on the CBN website, but it found nothing.  They’ve removed it from their site.  But thanks to Google (they must have eaten some of that cursed candy) you can read the whole column on the cached page.

So be careful this Halloween, and keep your kids and yourselves away from Halloween candy – ALL candy, because you can’t be sure which candy has been cursed.  Those witches are pretty smart you know, they’ll curse the candy that’s not sold as Halloween treats.  They’ll curse your innocent looking Snickers or Hershey bar.  They’ll curse that jawbreaker and even that expensive box of Halloween themed Moonstruck truffles, so BEWARE!

After reading that article I became very wary of my children who have  found the hidden Halloween candy and already eaten a few pieces.  I don’t know if I’ll sleep well tonight for fear the demonic spirits will turn them into:

So scary I have to drink a beer to calm my nerves.  Hey… Kimberly Daniels didn’t say anything about seasonal beers being cursed by witches, so this Snow Cap I’m drinking must be safe.  I don’t feel evil anyway… not yet…

While listening to the radio this morning, I heard somebody talking smack about somebody…

He has no scruples, no morals, no goal except anarchy, no plan except the end of planning. As Alfred patiently explains, “Some men aren’t looking for anything logical, like money. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.”

I thought the guy must have been talking about Dick Cheney.  Turns out it was Kenneth Turan’s review of The Dark Knight.

Their story of lawlessness, mayhem and murder in Iraq.

U.S. veterans of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are planning to descend on Washington from Mar. 13-16 to testify about war crimes they committed or personally witnessed in those countries.

“The war in Iraq is not covered to its potential because of how dangerous it is for reporters to cover it,” said Liam Madden, a former Marine and member of the group Iraq Veterans Against the War. “That’s left a lot of misconceptions in the minds of the American public about what the true nature of military occupation looks like.”

Iraq Veterans Against the War argues that well-publicised incidents of U.S. brutality like the Abu Ghraib prison scandal and the massacre of an entire family of Iraqis in the town of Haditha are not the isolated incidents perpetrated by “a few bad apples”, as many politicians and military leaders have claimed. They are part of a pattern, the group says, of “an increasingly bloody occupation”.

“The problem that we face in Iraq is that policymakers in leadership have set a precedent of lawlessness where we don’t abide by the rule of law, we don’t respect international treaties, so when that atmosphere exists it lends itself to criminal activity,” argues former U.S. Army Sergeant Logan Laituri, who served a tour in Iraq from 2004 to 2005 before being discharged as a conscientious objector.

Laituri told IPS that precedent of lawlessness makes itself felt in the rules of engagement handed down by commanders to soldiers on the front lines. When he was stationed in Samarra, for example, he said one of his fellow soldiers shot an unarmed man while he walked down the street.

“The problem is that that soldier was not committing a crime as you might call it because the rules of engagement were very clear that no one was supposed to be walking down the street,” he said. “But I have a problem with that. You can’t tell a family to leave everything they know so you can bomb the shit out of their house or their city. So while he definitely has protection under the law, I don’t think that legitimates that type of violence.”

Read the whole article here.

Michael Myers or

Dick Cheney?

From Thom Hartmann’s column:

When Columbus first landed on Hispaniola in 1492, virtually the entire island was covered by lush forest. The Taino “Indians” who loved there had an apparently idyllic life prior to Columbus, from the reports left to us by literate members of Columbus’s crew such as Miguel Cuneo.

When Columbus and his crew arrived on their second visit to Hispaniola, however, they took captive about two thousand local villagers who had come out to greet them. Cuneo wrote: “When our caravels… where to leave for Spain, we gathered…one thousand six hundred male and female persons of those Indians, and these we embarked in our caravels on February 17, 1495…For those who remained, we let it be known (to the Spaniards who manned the island’s fort) in the vicinity that anyone who wanted to take some of them could do so, to the amount desired, which was done.”

Cuneo further notes that he himself took a beautiful teenage Carib girl as his personal slave, a gift from Columbus himself, but that when he attempted to have sex with her, she “resisted with all her strength.” So, in his own words, he “thrashed her mercilessly and raped her.”

While Columbus once referred to the Taino Indians as cannibals, a story made up by Columbus – which is to this day still taught in some US schools – to help justify his slaughter and enslavement of these people. He wrote to the Spanish monarchs in 1493: “It is possible, with the name of the Holy Trinity, to sell all the slaves which it is possible to sell…Here there are so many of these slaves, and also brazilwood, that although they are living things they are as good as gold…”

Columbus and his men also used the Taino as sex slaves: it was a common reward for Columbus’ men for him to present them with local women to rape. As he began exporting Taino as slaves to other parts of the world, the sex-slave trade became an important part of the business, as Columbus wrote to a friend in 1500: “A hundred castellanoes (a Spanish coin) are as easily obtained for a woman as for a farm, and it is very general and there are plenty of dealers who go about looking for girls; those from nine to ten (years old) are now in demand.”

There’s more.  Hartmann also writes briefly about the “Pequot War of 1636.” 

I remember reading about this war in a college American Literature class and have never forgotten how the first American settlers praised God for enclosing the “savages” in a small area so that they could kill and burn them easily.

The quote from William Bradford’s journal:  “It was a fearful sight to see them thus frying in the fire and the streams of blood quenching the same, and horrible was the stink and scent thereof; but the victory seemed a sweet sacrifice, and they gave praise thereof to God, who had wrought so wonderfully for them.”

What a country.

So this is how we are winning the hearts and minds of the Iraqi people:

The committee staff report said Blackwater guards had engaged in nearly 200 shootings in Iraq since 2005, and in the vast majority of cases the guards fired their weapons from moving vehicles without stopping to count the dead or assist the wounded. In at least two cases, Blackwater paid victims’ family members who complained, and the company sought to cover up other episodes, the report said.

The staff report said that State Department officials approved the payments in the hope of keeping the shootings quiet, and in one case last year, helped Blackwater spirit an employee out of Iraq less than 36 hours after the employee, while drunk, killed a bodyguard for one of Iraq’s two vice presidents on Christmas Eve.

The report by the Democratic majority staff of a House committee adds weight to complaints from Iraqi officials, American military officers and Blackwater’s competitors that the company’s guards have taken an aggressive, trigger-happy approach to their work and have repeatedly acted with reckless disregard for Iraqi life.

…

In the case of the Christmas Eve killing, the report said that an official of the United States Embassy in Iraq suggested paying the slain bodyguard’s family $250,000, but a lower-ranking official said that such a high payment “could cause incidents with people trying to get killed by our guys to financially guarantee their family’s future.” Blackwater ultimately paid the dead man’s family $15,000.

In another fatal shooting cited by the committee, an unidentified State Department official in Baghdad urged Blackwater to pay the victim’s family $5,000. The official wrote, “I hope we can put this unfortunate matter behind us quickly.”

And we thought Abu Ghraib made us look bad.  Our government hired mercenaries at Blackwater along with their pals in the State Department are doing their best to make us look even worse.

The price for murdering a guy started at $250,000 (pretty low by U.S. Standards) and quickly dropped to $15,000 so as not to encourage people to commit suicide to enrich their families after they willingly provoke Blackwater security guards to kill them.

That kind of reminds me of some scenes in the Hearts and Minds documentary where they talked about how the government and the media spread propaganda about how the people of Vietnam did not value human life – that their lives were worth nothing.  It was bullshit of course, just like this is. 

Do they really think that there would be a rash of Iraqis volunteering themselves to get shot for a couple hundred thousand dollars?  I don’t think so…

So the price went down to $15,000 and then to $5,000 at the urging of an anonymous State Department official.  That’s great.  Our military doesn’t count Iraqi fatalities, and our hired guns aren’t accountable to anyone, until now I guess, and when they start shooting, they pretty much unload and leave any wounded innocent bystanders to fend for themselves.

When they are confronted by grieving family members, they hand out $5,000.  Not even enough to buy a decent used car.

They don’t seem to be following their own “Core Values.”

P.S.  Says here that Erik Prince, Chairman and CEO of Blackwater, is a fundamentalist Christian.  Guess that means God gave him a license to kill.

Has to do with Lord Cheney of course.

This is from today’s Seattle Post Intelligencer editorial:

Indeed, the notion of accountability is to Cheney what garlic is to a vampire.

The Daily Show had a great series about the Dick last week, watch them all!

Dick Move - John Oliver

Non Executive Decision – Dick, the fourth branch of government

You Don’t Know Dick – Safe -Cheney’s man-size safes

You Don’t Know Dick – Super pixelation power

You Don’t Know Dick – Blowfeldian “Secret” stamp logo 

According to researchers at the University of Hong Kong, there is a species of barnacle (Rhizocephalan Sacculina) of which the female will invade the body of male and female crustaceans (crabs in particular) in order to distribute their nutrient absorbing, branching root structure, mature and protrude a reproductive organ, mate with a passing male barnacle, and lay their eggs inside the host.

What’s special about this parasite is that they will first make the crab infertile, make them lose interest in mating, and, most interestingly, change the physiology and psychology of the male crabs in order to make them better mothers to the parasite’s egg sacks.

“The life cycle begins with the female cyprid invading the crabs and then developing into a parasite with an internal root system (interna). Once the interna matures, it will develop a reproductive body outside the crabs through the abdominal part called the virgin externa. Male cyprids will then enter the virgin externa, which give rise to a fertilized externa with the eggs brooding inside it. Larvae will then be released via the externa once the eggs became mature.”

Once the eggs emerge from the crab’s abdomen, it will nurture them to maturity the same way it would it’s own brood.

Ding dong the wicked fucking witch is dead. What a relief.

I just started reading Woodward’s “State of Denial”. Donald Rumsfeld is the devil.