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Throw Rag Returns to Seattle

Throw Rag Returns to Seattle

The Captain is in town tonight. Throw Rag is playing at El Corazon. I wish I could go but I can’t. Damnit!

The rest of you should go. You should all start getting shitfaced right now start stumbling towards The Seattle Tattoo Expo After Party featuring The Generators, God Spit, The Spittin’ Cobras, Zeke, and THROW RAG!

I recommend that at least one of you take an extra tighty whitey, because sometimes The Captain loses his.

My excuse for not going? None of your busiiness.

I’ll settle for this video tonight.

Hot Summer Day in Seattle

Hot Summer Day in Seattle

Summer finally arrived in Seattle the day after the 4th of July weekend.  That’s pretty normal around these parts.

It’s been getting warmer every day since the 4th, and today the weathermen say it’s going to be 94 degrees.   Too hot for some folks around here.  I can hear them complaining now…

Driving in to work today, (Why is the weather always the nicest during the work week?) I was listening to KPLU, and today’s installment of “Record Bin Roulette” was titled “Summertime.”  One of the bits they played was Marilyn Monroe in The Seven Year Itch saying: 

“Let me just go put something on.  I’ll go into the kitchen to get dressed.  When it’s hot like this you know what I do?  I keep my undies in the icebox.”

I went searching for a clip of this on YouTube and did not find it, but I did find this one, and it might even be better.

Why it’s good luck to wear your underwear inside out

Why it’s good luck to wear your underwear inside out

The cool thing is that when you wear your underwear inside out…

Now you get to wear that pair twice. Here’s why you won’t go to hell for it.

1st time you wear them, and they’re inside out:

knickers, panties, underwear
Undies, panties, underwear, pants, knickers, underpants

Say you get in an accident and someone notices you have your panties on inside out. You’re dying and the priest who’s giving you last rights asks you to confess all your sins. Toward the end of your list, he looks at you and says, “and, my dear, you’ve worn those panties two days in a row. All you did was turn them inside out so you could get away with it.” You can honestly say “no, it was dark. I, I, sputter, I wear my panties inside out for good luck…arrrrr*cough*gasp.” You’re not lying, therefore you won’t go to hell.

2nd time you wear them (obviously the first scenario didn’t happen if this case ever comes):

You get into an accident and they strip you down to put a tourniquet on your gushing femoral. They don’t even notice the dirty undies since they’re soaked in blood and whatever else might be coming out of you at the moment. And since they’re right side out, there’s really no question as to their cleanliness. Last rights are administered and before your last gasping breath, you say “I wore my panties twice.” No hell for you. Plus, he’s obligated by god and the government to never tell your mom.

If you survive the day…

If you get luckier than simply not ending up in hell, there is a strong possibility that those dirty underwear have accumulated a significant deposit of personal body odors from various sources. A non-insignificant portion of the population have a pleasant, possibly arousing, reaction to their own stench. In fact, there is evidence that our brain chemistry changes a little when we’re aroused and things we find absolutely disgusting when we are in our right mind get a pass when we’re horny. So, lucky you! Those stinky, dirty, crusty and stiff panties you’ve been excusing yourself for because “it’s lucky to wear your underwear inside out!” might actually give you a libidinal boost as you’re getting undressed for bed.

A quickie with your own hand is a perfect way to end the day. Sleep tight.

Apple TV’s 32nd Anniversary Announcement

Apple TV’s 32nd Anniversary Announcement

You Know What You WantQuietly this weekend, Apple, Inc., released a minor update to its so-far disappointing Apple TV software. The update, delivered around 3 o’clock Saturday morning, was quietly announced in a press release on ReutersYE (Youth Education). The computer maker and self-described New Media Darling has struggled to make the Apple TV, once known as the iTV prior to its launch, relevant in an age of Tivo, BitTorrent, Netflix, and XBox Live saturation of the passive entertainment, family-room market.

The previous update, “Take Two”, was meant to herald a new era for Apple’s only foray into the set-top box fray. No previous attempt by any technology company has managed the ubiquity of DVD players, VHS, or even the relatively small console gaming platforms.

This update, however, has responded to the market’s response to their first and second attempts at relevance. Among the user friendly improvements are the following items:

1. The ability to download podcasts from your Apple TV and have them saved to the Mac or PC to which it is synced.

2. Dynamic “genres” list for movies. Any genre you add your personally backed-up movies to will be listed in Apple TV’s movies/genres menu.

3. Better shading of menu items to produce a more “live action” appearance while waiting for the click of the IR remote control signal to register.

4. A reflection has been added to certain interface elements.

5. An “Add to Queue” option has been added to the previous “Play” and “Download” option in the “Podcasts” section.

6. Further enhancing the previous feature, a sort of “Playlist” feature has been incorporated so that you don’t have to return to a menu every time a one or two minute clip ends so that you can choose another one.

7. “Smart” playlists, enabling the pre-scheduling of up to 6 hours or non-stop, successive podcasts, music videos, movies, and television shows, have been added to the iTunes software. These playlists, which can be synced to and played on your Apple TV in an attempt to mimic the standard environment in which consumers of entertainment appreciate their widescreen, surround sound, darkened room home-theater setup from their couch, seem to be an attempt by Apple to “catch up” with the immature, yet persistent, crowd of home theater early arrivals who have offered these features for years.

8. Support has been added for a new remote that looks remarkably similar to the first gen iPod Nano. A small screen for quick menu selection, a circular “click wheel” (a technology pioneered by apple but seemingly abandoned with its recent “touch” products), and the diminutive form factor with a 6 button interface that has served hand held tech from Apple for so long.

9. A revamp of the “search” keyboard for online services. Instead of a square, highly unusable letter grid, Apple has adopted a common typing interface across all of its Apple TV interfaces. Coupled with the new scroll-wheel remote, entering text into search fields has remarkably improved usability, once a hallmark of Apple products, which cannot be matched by any other.

10. Removal of the distinction between the computer to which an Apple TV is synced and the content shared on the network. All content is available by selecting its source, similar to the way it was made available in the previous version of the Apple TV software.

These are the ten most interesting updates. The revision also includes a number of bug fixes from improving the response of the unit to clicks of the remote to close to real-time syncing between the Apple TV and its coupled iTunes installation. In a previous version these features were sorely missing or incalculably buggy.

In the first part of the new millennium, Apple Inc revolutionized the personal, portable entertainment industry. Today Apple Inc is a leader in portable entertainment technology with market leading positions in wireless communications, the iPhone, pocketable media libraries, iPod (Touch)™, and the yet unannounced iWiiPod portable theater system and gaming device.

Panties for Peace

Panties for Peace

According to the Register, women around the world are mailing their panties to leaders in Myanmar to protest the militant crackdown on citizens…

Ladies’ smalls sap generals’ vital energy
– By Lester Haines
“The Burmese military is facing an unexpected threat from female opponents to its regime – a deluge of panties dispatched to the country’s embassies in a “in a culturally insulting gesture of protest” against its recent crackdown on protestors.”

You can join the movement here!

Edit –
“This, just in: Junta leader Gen Than Shwe has vowed to sniff out the perpetrators and bring them in for a thorough debriefing.”